Dear Daddy,
I have been thinking about the conversations I would have had with you over the past ten years since you left us. Sometimes I have wondered: what would Daddy have said? Sometimes it has been: Did you see his latest Tweet? At times: ‘I can’t believe this is happening!’ And these days, it is: Daddy, it’s a good thing you are not around.
I will skip our dialogue about your daughter writing her memoir and spilling the family secrets. Let’s go right to Election 2016.
“America will never elect him,” is what you would have said when candidate Trump was running for president. You loved America; you valued the American ethics; and you had faith in its democracy. And I would have said: “When voters go to the polls, they will make the right choice.”
On the morning-after, I would have waited for your call, too stunned to take the initiative.
“Ye kaisey ho gaya?” How did this happen? I can almost hear your voice, incredulous, from across the oceans.
Speechless, I would have wept. I did a lot of crying that day.
Two days later, I would have called you: “Daddy, I have been blindsided; I was clueless. Khalid and I have decided to subscribe to the Wall Street Journal and start watching Fox News. I never want to be surprised again.”
“Do you think he is going to go through with the Muslim Registry?”
“At this point, nothing will surprise me.”
Day after Inauguration Day:
“Daddy, I just got back from the Women’s March. You won’t believe how many thousands of people turned up. Women were wearing pink hats. . . .”
“Why pink hats?”
“Uh! Well! Uh!” Of all the things, did I have to bring up pink hats? I can’t use the ‘P-word’ with my father.
Then you’d laugh. You knew; everyone in Pakistan watches CNN. You were putting me on.
I’d quickly change the subject.
Travel Ban:
“Daddy, you won’t believe all the Christians, Jews, Hindus were out there protesting. Everyone is standing up for us. They are going to court, organizing rallies, writing op-eds, it’s so re-assuring.”
“You wait and see. There will be more of that. America will recover.”
COVID-19:
“Pakistan just reported two cases of Coronavirus. Please be careful. Stay home.”
“I’d rather die than stay home.”
“Daddy!”
“You know your father. Ser nahin to khair nahin” You’d laugh.
“Don’t tease me. I am serious.”
A month later:
“What is the matter with these Pakistanis! Don’t they realize that they are infecting themselves and everyone around them. Going around partying, shopping, out on the crowded streets. Our cook insisted on going to his village to attend a wedding. Nothing I said would stop him. Now he is gone, Corona cases have surged, and I have told him to stay back until the disease subsides. Meanwhile, we are without a cook. When will this qom learn?”
“It’s not just the Pakistani qom Daddy; people here in some parts of the country are openly defying orders to social distance. Governors have refused to mandate masks. Can you believe it! What has happened to America?”
“It’s the president. He is the worst president America has had.”
George Floyd’s killing:
“This reminds me of the time I was in America in 1958. Racism against Blacks was an acceptable way of life; signs posted outside restaurants saying: No Negroes allowed. I thought that Obama’s election was a turning point, but apparently not.”
“But Daddy, this time people are speaking up. There are as many Whites protesting as there are Blacks, if not more. And they are not letting up. This is what gives me hope that the ship is turning.”
“Let’s see.” I would sense the skepticism in your voice. Now I’d be worried. Am I too optimistic? What do your wise eyes see that my near-sighted eyes are missing? These are moments when I wish you were here.
Election 2020.
“I am delighted that Biden will be the nominee. I have always had a soft spot for him.” I tell you.
“Really! How is that?”
“Remember the war in Bosnia. He was the only Senator that was speaking out against the arms embargo. I remember the image: raising his voice, raising his feet, pleading passionately, ‘people are being slaughtered, women are being raped, lift the arms embargo, allow the Muslims to defend themselves.’ And Clinton wouldn’t budge. When Obama won the nomination, I prayed that he pick Biden for VP. He is so seasoned and well-rounded. And decent. My goodness, we could use some decency in our highest office.”
I wonder what you would have said to that. Would you have agreed with me?
“So Daddy, who do you think Biden is going to pick as his running-mate?”
“I think he will pick….”
Oh, come on! Speak to me.
It’s OK; just Rest in Peace.
******************************
